Cosmic Energy and Kung Fu Nuns Collide at CERN

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By Andy T

Cosmic energy

What do martial art wielding nuns and CERN scientists have in common? Well, according to Gyalwang Drukpa, a Tibetan monk ranked second in Buddhist hierarchy only to the Dalai Lama, both delve into the secrets of cosmic energy.

Just lust week Drukpa led a dozen nuns from an Asian Buddhist order to display “hand-chops, high-kicks and punches” to physicists at the CERN research centre in Geneva.

“Both male and female energies are needed to better the world”, which is “as fundamental as the relationship between the sun and the moon”, said the priest when questioned on his visit.

However, Drukpa also stressed the visit was about promoting gender equality in Tibet, which has been suppressed for years. Under Chinese rule, Tibetan women have been barred from practicing martial arts since 1951.

The nuns, which were mostly teenagers with shaven heads in burgundy robes, were trained in kung fu by Drukpa to improve their health and well-being, and to expose them to the sacred cosmic energy rites previously restricted to men.

According to CERN director general Rolf Heuer, the visit was a wonderful idea. Just recently Heuer had sponsored a conference involving scientists, philosophers and theologians, which discussed the merits of science and religion collectively.

However, when the EU’s finance ministers questioned Heuer over the relevance between kung fu and dark matter research, the director replied meekly that both dealt with hand-chops, high-kicks and punches, with the former delivering them to the body, and the latter delivering them to the groin of the European Central Bank.

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